The Pagan Hierarchy
Ashley Yakeley has it all worked out: The Pagan Hierarchy.
Published Pagan Scholars look down on History Majors who look down on Folklore Majors who look down on Reconstructionist Pagans. Unitarian Pagans look down on Christo-Pagans who look down on Channelers, Mediums and Spiritualists. Discordians look down on Profiteering SubGenii who look down on Dues-Paying SubGenii who look down on UFO Researchers who look down on UFO Contactees who look down on People Who Think They're Aliens who mutually look down on People Who Think They're Vampires. Who are at the bottom, parallel with Junkies.
Kinda complicates the lyrics to the Tom Lehrer song a bit.
(But even with the roadmap I can't figure out the BBC's "When a druid isn't a druid". And I had no idea there was still an Archdruid running about with enough clout for politicians to take him seriously.)